Sometimes he could be just…Aaarrgghh
by Heksy
Summary: A certain blonde Slytherin has it out for Gryffindor's Golden Boy, but not quite as most expect. About dreams, revenge and forgiveness. OOC HPxDM
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story._

**Sometimes he could be just…Aaarrgghh**

~~  
He walked through a hallway of a beautiful house.  
He heard voices, but couldn't make out what they were saying.  
Coming to a doorway, he looked in and saw four boys and three girls.  
The boys all had jet black hair and silver-grey eyes, while the girls all had platinum blonde hair and emerald green eyes.  
One of the children spotted him and called out.  
"Mommy! You are home. Did you bring us presents?" the boy asked impatiently jumping up and down in his excitement.  
He smiled and said "Hello Dasher. I don't know if there are any presents. You should ask Mitzy.  
She went with me and she might have brought back something, but I can't promise anything"  
Now the boys were all jumping up and down asking for presents, for they knew their mommy always brought back something nice for them.  
Two of the girls looked at him, with a mischievous grin.  
"Can we get a hug, Mommy" they asked in unison.  
He looked down at the twins and eyed them carefully.  
"What are the two of you up to? Dancer, care to tell me? Nothing? Vixen? You are not up to anything? Hmmm…very well then" he said and gave them both a hug, not noticing the note sticking to his back, after releasing the two.  
The note said "Property of Daddy".  
Not one of the kids said anything and pestered the house elf, called Mitzy, about their presents.

Only one girl stayed back a bit, she was the shy one of the seven.  
"Cupid, why are you not asking for your present?" he asked a bit surprised.  
The little girl looked at him with big tear filled eyes and just shook her head a bit.  
"Come here little one. Tell me what is wrong."  
After some time Cupid walked up to him and threw her little arms around his legs.  
"C-Comet and D-Donner…they…they said I was not getting any presents. They s-said you did not like me as much as the rest of them" she sobbed and buried her little face in his robes.  
"What? No! Why would I not like you? You are my precious little princess. Of course I like you. I have to like you, because I love you" he stated, quite taken aback by the actions of the other twins.  
"Comet and Donner? Get here right this instant" he called out sternly.  
The boys knew they were in trouble, when they saw their little sister with their mom.  
"Tattle-tale" they hissed at her.  
The little girl hid behind the legs of her mommy.  
"Tattle-tale? Is that what she is? What were you thinking, telling her I did not like her as much as the rest of you? Don't bother answering that. You both go to your rooms now and think about your actions. We will see if you even get to have your presents" he said, looking at his sons angry.

Then he heard another voice and he turned around to see his husband smile brightly.  
"You are early, love. How did it go?" the man asked.  
He looked at his husband and couldn't stop a giggle.  
There was his Adonis, wearing an apron with 'Kiss the Cook' on it, his black mop of hair dusted with flour and a streak of marinara sauce on his cheeks.  
"I think you better sit down" he said.  
His husband looked a bit worried and sat down on one of the chairs in the room.  
"Don't worry, everything is fine. It's just…well…we have number eight under way.  
And I think the name Blitzen would be just right, as the baby is a she. Makes a nice even number, doesn't it?" he said, smiling brilliantly at his husband, only to see the man fall out his chair in a dead faint.~~ 

Draco woke up screaming in terror, "What the bloody hell…?" he said to the empty room.  
Oh right, he was in his seventh year at Hogwarts, it was a Saturday and it was time to go to breakfast.  
Yes, yes, it was all a stupid dream.  
Relieved to know it had all been a dream, Draco went to take a shower, got dressed and headed down to breakfast.

The dream hadn't left his mind, though and when he entered the great hall, he walked over to the Gryffindor table to give Potter a piece of his mind.  
"Potter, I will have you know I am NOT a 'mommy'. I am a Malfoy and Malfoy men do not make 'mommies', they take 'mommies'. I do not want you to be my husband, I do not want to have eight children and they most certainly NOT will be given the names of Santa's reindeer. Do I make myself clear, Potter" he sneered and walked towards the Slytherin table.  
Harry sat there, totally flabbergasted.  
"But…but…we aren't even in a relationship, Malfoy" Harry called after him.  
Malfoy turned around and looked at him.  
"That is entirely beside the point, Potter" he said haughtily.  
Harry watched the blonde boy dumbfounded.  
Looking around the Gryffindor table he saw the rest of his house mates looking at him with looks of concern and a bit of humour.  
Turning back to study the Slytherin he shook his head exasperated.  
Sometimes Malfoy could be just…Aaarrgghh.


	2. Chapter 2

1001 ways to get back at a Malfoy

Harry sat at the Gryffindor table, contemplating one-thousand-and-one ways to get back at a certain Slytherin.  
He could hang Malfoy upside down from a ceiling and whip his ass.  
Maybe a hex to make his hair turn purple for five minutes, everytime the boy said his own name.  
Or maybe Harry should slip into the Slytherin dorms and paint Malfoys' nails in all colours of the rainbow, sparkles included. Why, do you ask?  
Well, Draco had managed to shell-shock our green eyed hero.

The blonde had walked into the great hall, straight to the table where Harry was eating breakfast with his friends and had started to 'explain' to Harry what he, Malfoy, thought about married life.  
Something about having eight kids named after Santa's reindeer, not going to be a mommy and certainly not wanting to be married to Harry.  
Now Harry was all for that, mind you, but why had Malfoy said all of those things?  
Was that boy a few cards short of a full deck or something?  
When Harry pointed out that they weren't even in a relationship, the sneering blonde had the audacity to proclaim that thát was entirely beside the point.  
At that moment Harry was convinced the blond was certifiable.

After this weird exchange it all went sour quickly at the Gryffindor table.  
Harry's friends thought the boys fancied each other.  
Even though Harry was very adamant that they didn't.  
He? And Malfoy? That was like…eeeeeuuuuwwww…so NOT happening.  
But Harry's house-mates were relentless.  
They were giving him a third degree interrogation and some were even 'explaining' the ever present 'sexual tension' between the two hottest guys in school.  
Sexual tension? What the hell were they talking about? As if!

There was nothing sexual about it, he loathed Draco.  
_* Draco… *_ Harry's consciense said  
_* You always call him 'Malfoy' and now it is 'Draco' all of a sudden? Since when are you on a first name basis? *_  
^Since never!^ Harry thought defiantly to himself.  
_* Mmm hmmm and of course you don't find him the least bit attractive, do you? *_ his conscience pushed on.  
^Hell no!^  
_* If you say so, but why have you been staring at him for the last…oh…five minutes or so? _*  
^I have not!^  
_* Of course not. You are not looking at those luscious lips, that muscle-toned body or those beautiful silver-grey eyes. Nope, you are not noticing any of that, because you loathe him, I'm sure!*_  
^Will you keep out of this? I am thinking about getting rid of that cute and hot piece of sex-on-legs and you are bothering me^

_*.........*_

^What?^  
_* Oh nothing, it's just you denoted him as being a cute and hot piece of sex-on-legs *_  
^I most certainly did not!^  
_* Yes, you did. You like him, admit it *_  
Harry groaned, great…now he was having a discussion with himself about the Slytherin?  
^Okay, sure…he is kinda good looking, but that doesn't mean I like him or want to snog him or anything^ he thought to himself  
_* Who said anything about snogging? And he is not just kinda good looking, he is absolutely fucking gorgeous. Where is your Gryffindor courage now, huh? The Saviour of the Wizarding World is having trouble admitting the truth to himself? I don't know you anymore.*_  
"Would you just shut the hell up?" Harry shouted out and then realised what he had done.  
He clasped his hand in front of his mouth and his friends were looking at him as if he'd grown another head.  
"Harry, you alright mate?" Ron asked worriedly.  
"Yeah, I'm sorry. It's just…oh bloody hell. I have to do something" Harry sighed.

He stood up and walked over to the Slytherin table.  
Standing in front of Malfoy and looking straight at him he said;  
"Malfoy, I have a few things to say to you too. First of all, I have no idea what you were rambling about. It takes two people to have a marriage, you know? And who in their right minds, would name their kids after Santa's reindeer anyway?"  
"Luna would" Blaise Zabini, another Slytherin, said helpful.  
"My point exactly" said Harry with a pointed look.  
"Second…even though I think you are cute and hot and what-not, I know for a fact that we are not dating, so how you came to the conclusion you were to be 'the mommy' in a relationship that doesn't exist is beyond me.  
And last, but not least, ARE YOU INSANE?" he screeched at the blonde.  
Malfoy wasn't the least bit impressed and just shrugged his shoulders.  
"I'm not really sure, because the dream I had felt very real to me and I wanted to clear up a few things, before we even got started" he said matter-of-factly and continued eating.  
"What? Started? Huh?" Harry spluttered, completely at a loss as to what to say.  
Draco looked up once more, rose from the bench and walked around the table towards Harry.  
"Harry? I think you look absolutely adorable when you don't know what to say" he said lovingly and planted a kiss on Harry's nose.  
Then he walked out the great hall, leaving behind a stunned Harry and a eerily quiet hall.


	3. Chapter 3

**Revenge is a dish best served cold**

Harry stomped out the great hall in search of that whack-job, Draco.  
He was going to repay that…that…snake-in-the-grass for what he'd done.  
*Oh yes, pink would most definitely be a good colour for the blond* he thought with an evil glint in his eyes.  
He would stop by at Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes to buy some 'stuff' to take his revenge out on that jerk.  
Harry walked through the hall, but to no avail, Draco was nowhere to be found.

Oh well, it was a Hogsmeade weekend, so he'd stop by at Fred and George's first.  
Harry had the perfect plan.  
It was almost Halloween and the costumes would be picked out by most of the students.  
Knowing Malfoy, that meant the blonde had picked out a costume already and Harry knew just what to do.  
He walked into the twins' shop and looked around to see if he could find the things he needed.  
"Ah Fred, it seems we have a highly honoured customer today" came George's voice from behind the counter.  
"I see, dear brother, we are indeed very privileged to welcome him to our humble store" Fred said in a mock affected tone.  
Harry smiling brightly at the twins, making the older Weasleys look suspiciously at him.  
Normally Harry was rather shy.  
There was something going on, they just had to figure out what.

"Well, what can we do for you today, Harry?" Fred asked.  
Harry started to order some items, that had the twins raise their brows, but they didn't say anything.  
After about half an hour they were finished and Harry was grinning like a maniac.

"Are these…"  
"…for you?  
"Or is there some…"  
"…lucky girl who gets to have…"  
"…her way with you?" they said, finishing each other's sentences with the ease of years of practice. Harry just stood there chuckling and said nothing.  
"Well, if you don't want to tell…"  
"…we can't make you. But will you…"  
"take some pictures…"  
"…when you're done?" the twins asked, getting an inkling that this was not meant to be used in some kinky sex play, but to be a fair amount of trouble for someone.  
The boy nodded enthusiastically, it was a very good idea, he might just do that.  
Harry paid for the items and shrunk them down to fit in his robepocket.  
Saying goodbye he left the shop.

He had one more stop to make and went to 'Otto's Outrageous Outfits' and shopped for a costume to complete his revenge.  
Browsing through the racks, Harry found the perfect costume for himself and asked for a fitting.  
Otto was more than obliged to help the teen, as he had picked out the most expensive outfit in the entire shop.  
When Harry turned around to look in the mirror, his image whistled and blew him kisses saying "Me-ow, you look good enough to eat."  
Harry grinned roguishly and felt the same.  
He sure did look good and he felt great in this attire.  
Harry paid for his costume and asked if he could just browse a bit more.  
Otto said Harry was welcome to browse as much as he wanted, of course…after charging him one-hundred-and-twenty-six galleons for the costume Otto would have served him tea is he asked for it Harry thought amused.  
Harry knew 'Otto's' was the bees-knees when it came to expensive, one-of-a-kind costumes and figured Malfoy would have gone there to buy his.  
He guessed right, when he saw Draco's costume hanging from a rack in the back of the shop.  
* Vampire huh? How original…NOT! * He thought to himself and looked around to see if Otto was watching. Nope, the coast was clear.  
He switched the costume with his freshly bought items and put a glamour-spell over the costume, to make it appear to be the original one.  
He also spelled the 'clothing' to change on Halloween at eleven pm, to show what they really looked like.  
Yes, this would turn out to be the revenge to outdo all others. Was he or was he not The-Boy-That-Defeated-Voldieshorts?

~~0~~

Halloween Eve

The day seemed to creep by for Harry. He was very excited about tonight.  
He was so absorbed by his thoughts, he didn't notice Draco walking straight at him, head  
buried in a book.  
They collided and fell on their butts, both of them looking very surprised.  
"Watch where you're going, Emerald" Draco smiled, crept towards Harry and gave him another kiss on his nose.  
"You look so cute, when you're confused" he laughed softly.  
Draco stood up, brushed of his robes, picked up his book and ruffled Harry's hair.  
"You better watch it yourself, Mercury" Harry smirked, stood up and walked away, leaving behind a speechless Draco.  
"Mercury?" he shrugged his shoulders and started walking, not noticing Harry looking back with a malicious glint in his eyes.  
Oooohhh…he was going to enjoy tonight.  
That tease was getting what he deserved al right.  
Kissing him on the nose again? The nerve…

Finally it was time to get changed.  
Harry took a shower, dried himself off and used a shaving spell on his face.  
His black shoulder-length hair he tied back with a shimmering green ribbon.  
He put on the skin tight leather pants, that showed off his ass in the most delicious way.  
Pulling on his knee-high black leather boots and putting a collar of green leather around his neck,  
he looked at the 'pièce de resistance'; his new 'soulreaper' shirt.  
It's sleeves and front were laced up and the cuffs were tight around his wrists, but not hindering.  
Harry decided to leave the shirt a bit open, to show off his tanned and muscled chest.  
He finished his look with a wide black belt around his waist that had a dragon belt buckle.  
Excited he put on a little of his favourite cologne and went downstairs to the common room.

When Harry came down the stairs, everyone stopped talking to look at him, mouths agape.  
"You lot will catch flies that way" he chuckled.  
Seamus swallowed a few times.  
"Harry? Do you have a date tonight? If not, I will be yours to do with as you please" the Irishman said panting slightly.  
The boy practically drooled at the sight of this impressive, sexy man in front of him.  
Harry smiled and said "Although I'm gay, I am no fool Seamus. You are a butterfly and will shag anything with a hole, if you get half a chance. But thanks for the compliment"  
And with those words he walked out of the common room, to get to the party.  
It was five to eleven, when he walked into the great hall and saw quite a few people eyeing him.  
There was a hand on his ass in mere seconds and he didn't even have to turn around to know it was that retched Slytherin again.  
"Take your hand off my ass, Malfoy" he warned the blonde.  
"But I like your ass, Potter. It's so muscled and tight. I would love to pound into it right now" Malfoy grinned, lust evident in his eyes.  
"In your dreams, Malfoy" Harry hissed.  
"Well, actually quite the opposite in my dreams, Harry" he whined.  
The blond started to pout and Harry forced himself not to lash out at him.  
Harry could wait and it was only five more minutes, before he would get his revenge.

The black haired beauty walked over to the punch and ladled some in a glass.  
When he turned around he saw Ron standing next to him.  
The redhead finally recognized him and looked him over a few times.  
"Bloody hell, mate. You look dangerous" his friend exclaimed.  
"That's the point, Ron" Harry grinned.  
"You will find out soon enough, why that is" he said cryptically.  
That's when they heard a shriek and they turned towards the source of the yelling.  
"What the fuck? Who did this?" Malfoy bellowed.  
Everyone started to laugh as they saw what the Slytherin was wearing.

He was in a very skimpy medi-witch costume, some frilly pink ribbons that scented of strawberries tied his hair in pig tails, a pink leather collar around his neck, white fishnet stockings and a pair of self adjusting high heeled pink pumps.  
Harry walked over to the enraged blonde, took out a leash and hooked it onto the collar around Draco's neck.  
He then reached in his pocket and pulled out a can of 'Tooting Hooters Spray' and sprayed it inside the low cut neckline of the costume, being careful not to come in contact with it himself.  
Malfoy was shocked into a stupor and couldn't react, until he noticed he started to grow breasts.  
He touched them and they tootled at which his eyes grew big and a bit teary.  
The students were in stitches and even some of the staff members had trouble keeping their laughter in.  
"Now, Draco my love, you actually are the mommy" Harry said dangerously.  
He paraded around, showing off "his" Draco on the leash.  
"This is what happens when you taunt the most powerful wizard in the world" Harry whispered in the shocked blonde's ear.  
He then unhooked the leash, waved his hand and Draco was back to his original self.  
"Now, what do you say?" Harry asked softly.  
"I-I'm sorry, Harry. I won't do it again." Draco answered with sad eyes.  
He opened his arms in an invitation to Draco, who took it without hesitation.  
"You better believe it" Harry said warmly and kissed the gorgeous man in his arms.


End file.
